We need a new religion. The grinding of the cosmic wheel is sustained by a continuous oiling of faith, the assumption by each individual that somewhere, deep in the bowels of the universe, something is keeping the thing spinning. But how, when the walls between us and eternity have worn so thin, can ...
On the front page of the subreddit r/me_irl today, we see a touching scene; as user jmk2017 so helpfully transcribed:"Two Golden Retriever puppies, a white one and a yellow one, on a road. The yellow puppy (with a black leash) is sitting, while the white puppy (with a purple leash) is holding ...
I've got no good music for gray days. Maybe this is the product of some idiosyncrasy in my tastes; maybe there's some combination of timbre and tempo that would suit these sorts of afternoons, which seem to be continuously gathering themselves up to fall on our heads and never quite getting ...
There exist two buildings on this campus where you can eat as many cookies as you want. I don’t think we’ve really come to terms with this, as an institution or as a community. We’ve got the situation covered in the most logistical sense; there’s not going to be a run on the dessert counter ...
In the rare moments of self-reflection I eke out between bouts of screaming and flower arranging, I find myself puzzled by the fact that I continue to play video games. I generally take it for granted that, in any given week, I'm going to spend at least 10 or 12 hours chipping away at a set of ...
It’s seven on a Saturday, and after two or three hours of trying, I’ve finally managed to get a good mope going. There’s no experience so aesthetically palpable as a real good mope -- lying back on the velvet fainting couch you lifted off the sidewalk, hand across your forehead, hastily cobbled-together ...
Recently, I’ve been experimenting with background movies. The idea is fairly self-explanatory — a movie played in the background of a party, social gathering or just when sitting around alone, crying. The movie isn’t intended to be watched; in fact, the point is to not watch it. Of course, the ...
Among certain segments of the hipster community, there has arisen a consensus that the world actually ended sometime in the '60s, and that the three subsequent generations have just been milling about the wreckage waiting for the other shoe to drop. In 1967, the undulating protoplasm of capitalism ...
You’ve been working at the deli for three years now. The pay is garbage, but the hours are decent. An older man comes up to the counter and puts in his order. “No problem,” you reply. Suddenly, disgust. A snarl erupts across the man’s face. He begins to berate you for your poor manners. You ...
Given how expensive they are, it’s hard not to see your dorm as a gift horse with a serious case of lockjaw. However, studies (I totally haven’t made up) show that fluorescent lighting is the leading cause of ego death among 18 to 22 year-olds, so it seems appropriate that I should furnish you with ...
