“Tom vs. Time” is reaching an untimely pinnacle for Patriots fans. As in, is it time to worry about Tom ... for good ... like really start sounding the alarm ... and realizing there’s no backup plan. Uh oh.
Brady’s arm unremarkably expired on a fourth quarter heave to Phillip Dorsett in the dying embers of a 26–10 defeat to Matt Patricia’s Detroit Lions. Tom, leaning back as if he was creaking in a rocking chair, appeared to blindly chuck a wobbly spiral into triple coverage.
And speaking of backup plans, the Colts brought on Jacoby Brissett to throw a Hail Mary on the final play in their loss to the Eagles. Asked why the change was made, the quarterback with perhaps the greatest natural gifts in history, Andrew Luck, explained that Brissett “has a stronger arm than [he does].”
In case you forgot, the Patriots traded Brissett for Phillip Dorsett.
You may say that since Jimmy Garoppolo tore his ACL for the 49ers, trading him when Belichick did (*cough Brady requested cough*) was inherently correct. Sure, chide the boy all you want for trying to stretch a running play a couple yards, but have you ever seen Tom engage a defender like that? Jimmy G is elastic enough. Maybe Belichick sprinkled some of his dark magic upon the poor boy.
The 49ers are rebuilding (unless you listen to Richard Sherman), and they can waver through a lack of expectations while they wait for the greener pastures of Jimmy G to return. There’s no rush. Their coach isn’t a surly old man in a hoodie.
The Pats? How about Brian Hoyer, ironically the 49ers starter last year when they stumbled to a 0–6 record. Draft picks? They used a first rounder on win-now piece Sony Michel, who — given the fickle nature of running backs — was probably a reach. A Sony PlayStation to a team that needed a television set.
The offensive line is underwhelming without Nate Solder. The defense has the second-fewest sacks and has allowed the second-most rushing yards. There’s no Vince Wilfork, Richard Seymour or Jerod Mayo saving that front seven.The secondary is a hair better, but Stephon Gilmore and Devin McCourty aren’t Ty Law and Rodney Harrison.
The biggest problem, of course, is that Tom Brady isn’t Tom Brady. He isn’t the Tom of 50-touchdown glory. He isn’t the Tom whose hairstyle oddly resembled Justin Bieber’s at one point.
Romanticizing “Tom vs. Time” (which actually had an odd amount of romance) into a folkloric testament to Tom’s body was cute as the Patriots romped their way to the AFC title last season. When Brady throws for 133 yards against Detroit? When the Pats have a minus-20 point differential through three weeks, fourth-worst in the NFL? Not as much.
Time may be winning. Cue "falling off a cliff" jokes. But hey! Brian Hoyer will be there to catch you, ready to play with his Sony PlayStation.
(Guys remember, the Pats are STILL going to make the playoffs. Relax.)
The Anti-Bostonian: The case against romanticizing Tom's battle with Father Time
