It happens early

Today marks the 62nd day of the "Red Zone." The Red Zone is a term coined by the media to describe "a period of vulnerability for sexual assaults, beginning when first-years first walk onto campus until Thanksgiving break," according to a Sept. 10, 2014 BusinessInsider article.When we were first-years, we were concerned about making friends, impressing the people in our halls, the people that we all hoped to make our friends. We consequently felt pressured to do things that we didn’t want to -- pressured, for example, to go to parties where we may not have felt totally comfortable and to do certain things because we assumed that was what people did in college. This is the reality: guys have grinded on us at Tufts Dance Collective (TDC) parties, and at a frat party someone put their hand up my skirt without my consent. When some guy was grinding into me at TDC even though he was a lot older than I was and even though I didn’t like it, I put up with it because he was one of my choreographers. When we were first-years, we didn’t know the power dynamics that were in play between upperclassmen and first-years. We didn’t know that when people grabbed my ass in frat basements, it counted as sexual assault. We’ve had Tufts University Police Department officers ask us, “Why were you out?” and “Why didn’t you call SafeRide?” when we were harassed on the street during a short walk home from a friend's house. We have had people -- friends, family, authority figures and otherwise -- tell us that we can avoid these situations if we don’t go to parties, if we don’t drink, if we don’t dress a certain way. However, the problem with this advice is that sexual violence can happen in any situation. It can happen when you’re in your dorm room and when you’re stone cold sober. It can happen with someone you know, trust or are even in a relationship with. Either way, these suggestions, although intended to be helpful, are inherently dangerous as they negate a lot of real experiences and take away agency from the assailant and place responsibility and blame on those affected by sexual violence. The days between the first day of school and Thanksgiving Break during first year are when most sexual violence on college campuses occurs, but that is only one small part of the problem. The stories read during the last two years of It Happens Here have not only been from first-years but from childhoods, other school years, senior years. Our assailants have been strangers, friends, family, men, women, genderqueer people and members of Greek life or sports teams. We, the members of Consent Culture Network and the organizers of It Happens Here, are evidence that trauma can live in all of us, regardless of our religion, our race, our gender identity, our sexual identities, our ability or class. As an organization, we strive to be trauma-sensitive and survivor-centric, and we hope to end the silence around sexual violence. Yes, sexual violence is a horrific and traumatizing reality that exists on this campus, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t be sensitive of that and try to change the way we talk about it. Be respectful of your peers, and be sensitive to their experiences -- as we all know too well, these stories are far more common than you would think. If you’re interested in hearing more about what we do at Tufts or how to get involved with Consent Culture Network or It Happens Here, email tuftsccn@gmail.com