Helicopter parents face a dilemma. While they believe they should be allowed to check on their college student children, these children are also college students, and the university also treats them as independent adults. Tufts is therefore required to protect their confidentiality if parental interference is undesired.
The Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act mandates that all schools receiving funding from the U.S. Department of Education must restrict parents' rights to access children's education records. Tufts is required to grant students their rights; it must balance this, however, with the push from parents to be involved in their children's academics.
According to Dean of Academic Advising and Undergraduate Study Carmen Lowe, official Tufts policy technically considers the student to be the only person responsible for his or her education and his or her adherence to university rules.
"Parents are not our students," Lowe said. "So by federal law we aren't allowed to share with them students' grades or other academic information."
If they do want their parents to see their final grade in a class, Tufts students can share such information by adding their parents to the MyJumbo online portal.
"Only a couple of years old, MyJumbo allows us to keep parents involved without constantly pressuring faculty and staff to violate federal law," Lowe explained.
It's not uncommon for the Dean's Office to receive calls or emails from concerned parents demanding explanations about their children's academic performance. Lowe usually refers these parents to the associate deans, who interact with students more often.
"The associate deans try to act as buffers between parents and faculty," Lowe said. "At the college level, it is very inappropriate for parents to call faculty directly to question them about class policies or a student's progress."
According to Lowe, the majority of the information that parents need to know can already be found in the letter that she sends out together with Dean of Student Affairs Bruce Reitman every August.
In certain circumstances, as in cases of hospitalization or withdrawal from the university, the university makes a point to contact parents or guardians.
Most other situations can usually be resolved with better communication between parents and the student, according to Lowe.
The flow of information — and influence — between parents and students can become a point of contention when a student wants to major in a subject that their parents don't necessarily associate with a secure and well−paid profession. Julie Jampel, Supervising Clinician and Training Director at the Counseling Center, suggested that such a situation could cause distress.
"The frustration comes when students want to make their own choices despite parental disapproval and the fear of disappointing them," Jampel said.
Sophomore Katherine Lowe found herself in a similar situation with her parents when she decided to drop her intended chemistry major in favor of geology.
"My dad insisted that I should do a ‘hard science' that teaches you important analytical skills and is supposed to be more useful in the future," she said.
Although the choice of a major seems to be a common point of tension between students and parents, the mere choosing of classes that satisfy parental expectations can also cause some sparks to fly.
Tensions flared between sophomore Ann Yacoubian and her father last year when she dropped Biology 13 with the intention to retake it, while staying in an acting class.
"My father was extremely disappointed and thought that my entire pre−med track was in jeopardy and that I was throwing my future away despite generally good grades," Yacoubian said.
She had to solicit help from her adviser, her dean and her biology professor in order to convince her father that the decision was in her best interest at the moment.
"Selling this one course adjustment to my parents was a battle," Yacoubian said. "I pretty much had to plead [with] my father not to contact the dean himself."
Aside from the occasional flare−up, though, Associate Dean of Undergraduate Education and Program Director for Health Professions Advising Carol Baffi−Dugan said she has seen considerably less pressure from parents on their pre−med students than decades ago.
"Medicine is no longer the glamorous and lucrative career that it used to be, so parents are cautioning their children about going into medicine," she said. "In addition, more parents are involved across the board, so pre−meds don't stand out more than anyone else."
Across all majors, many college students welcome positive parental involvement and use their parents as a valuable resource in many areas. This includes career planning, Director of Career Services Jean Papalia said in an email to the Daily.
"We encourage parents to share their own experiences in the world of work, to speak with their students about jobs, employers and industries," she said. "Likewise, we urge students to think of their parents' network in arranging informational interviews to learn more about career fields."
Papalia cited the parent−student networking event on Parents Weekend last October as an example of the successful exchange of information across the generations and an easy way for students to connect with professionals.
"I try to keep my parents in the loop, because they are informed and really helpful about the current economy and the job hunt, so they could be a valuable resource about job opportunities," sophomore Alexandra Goldy said.
On the other hand, there is a line.
"A successful college student must be independent and in control of their own choices academically and socially," Goldy said.
Jampel emphasized clear and respectful communication between parent and student in the cases of conflicts regarding choices of major, career paths and other academic matters.
"We work with students on how to make their own choices even in the face of parental disapproval," she said. "We encourage them to have adult−to−adult conversations and keep talking in a way that the parents would listen and eventually come around."
