Of all the lessons I learned while on the road as a semi-professional cup stacker, it was the importance of making good memories that mattered most. I broke a lot of hearts on the Bible Belt Cup Stacking circuit, and I had mine torn up once or twice. Our hedonistic lifestyle with no regard for UTIs or the future meant we were always doing awesome stuff. And what happened when we inevitably parted ways due to the harsh realities of our paths in life? We accepted it because no good thing lasts forever and we had enough Nutella'd and handcuffed memories to keep that fire going.
Let me put it this way: did the X-Men spend the last week they had together, before going their separate ways at the end of the movie, moping about how it was the last time they were going to fight Magneto as a group? Hell no; they just ganged up on that old crazy and delivered the beating of a lifetime. So when they finally did break up, they all had some things to remember. Stopping to say out loud, "Hey, Professor X, I don't think I'm ever gonna get brain-prodded by your Cerebro ever again. … Aw … this is so sad," would've led to some Storm-brain splatter on the floor. Don't stop to think and reminisce before you even have a reason to reminisce, but instead do some sweet spinning kicks that you can stew upon when the time is right (for me, it's usually while weeping in the back of a Chuck E. Cheese's).
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think Carter stopped in the middle of an international crime syndicate investigation to say, "LEE! We spent the last hour and a half running through boat parties, crossing the Pacific and gambling in Las Vegas — I probably won't be seeing your tiny little Asian behind until the next ‘Rush Hour'! Oh, and look out behind you!" There are times for action, and then there are times to get all weepy and emotional. Chris Tucker has it right: Do things when you can and tell war stories over a beer later. If you mix the two up then you lose the chance to make new memories and you'll regret lost opportunities.
Name a buddy cop movie. "Lethal Weapon" (1987)? "Bad Boys" (1995)? "Demolition Man" (1993)? Well guess what: They didn't even acknowledge the fact that they'd be splitting up until five short minutes before the credits! It's not like they didn't want to, but they had a plot to progress and a script to work through; stopping to chitchat about their feelings wouldn't help anyone. Cock that pistol, put a round in the chamber and get going. But don't forget to look good while you're doing it.
I, like a number of you Tufts students, am graduating today. I've been making the time I had left as an undergrad as debauched and reckless as possible (a la some of the classic college films: "Old School" (2003) and "Animal House" (1978)), as all of you should have been, too. There will be time for mopey walks down Pro Row when you have your diploma and when you're an old (mid-20s) real person nostalgia-ing for the glory days — now you have the chance to squeeze in a few more awesome stories with your friends. It's your chance to uppercut Magneto and to chase mysterious crime lords through the seedy underbelly of Hong Kong.
I have my cups, ready to stack; where are yours?
