Sometimes you think you know something. You would bet money on it. But, in the end, you would lose that money if you did. While writing a paper on Paul Gauguin, I realized halfway through that I had been spelling his name wrong the whole time. This type of mistake is a relatively small problem, but still something that has the ability to shake the foundation on which you have built your life.
You may say I'm being dramatic, but once you start doubting yourself all bets are off. This got me thinking about all those small things that we do wrong. We go about our business saying "restauranteur"; that we "could care less" or find ourselves singing along, "I can see clearly now 'Lorraine' is gone." And while it may be super annoying to people that know otherwise, it's really not that big a deal. It's okay that I called balloons "ballooms" until I was five years old and that my dad calls "Seinfeld" (1989-1998) "The Seinfeld Show" despite my constant nagging.
We all figure it out eventually - finding out that they are called "balloons" was quite the game-changer - and go about our lives as wiser and more enlightened people. Let's be honest; we can all be know-it-alls and love to blow other people's trips when they don't use "whom" or conspicuously pronounce the L- in Ralph Fiennes' name. But I feel like often we are questioning the wrong things. These little things are easy to get wrong and therefore easy to correct. You get called out once or hear something said the right way and you change your behavior so you don't look unintelligent (or a better way of saying "stupid"). But that doesn't take much audacity. What does take courage is challenging conventional wisdom.
I often hear people say how many things are "so Tufts." I think the plethora of things I'm referring to is pretty self-explanatory so I won't go into it (ahem, social justice). This, often accompanied with an eye roll, can cheapen many people's pursuits of social change. A lot of things get brushed off in the shuffle. Because of this, it is sometimes suggested that the questioning of things that people of conscience see as unjust is bothersome. I see that in the constant stream of talks, meetings, symposiums, and Social Justice Seders that it can seem that normal parts of our daily lives can get lost - and it can be overwhelming. But it's important to keep questioning. It takes courage and tenacity and can be done on any level.
We are in such an exciting position in our lives. In the face of an injustice, we can be courageous enough say that something that is happening is wrong. While this is far more exciting than correcting someone's grammar, it is definitely a whole lot scarier. But I guess that is kind of why we are here. We all have convictions that are important to us and important to the greater good of whatever communities we are a part of. While we wait to find things we are passionate enough about to put ourselves out there for, I suggest we blissfully sing along, "the ants are my friends, they're blowin' in the wind" and learn about the "statue" of limitations, and don't worry about it too much. Go ahead and sing loudly and let them stare. In the meantime I am going to go back through my paper and hopefully spell Gauguin correctly this time.
Eva Batalla-Mann is a sophomore majoring in peace and justice studies and community health. She can be reached at Eva.Batalla_Mann@tufts.edu.
