My older peers have all given me the same advice. "Going into college with a boyfriend or girlfriend is the worst mistake you can make."
For some reason, being attached to a member of the opposite sex in college is almost as taboo as getting smashed on your first night as a freshman. There's this concern that if you have a significant other who does not attend your school, then you'll miss out on a social life, or never make close friends.
Even worse, if word gets out that you're exclusively seeing someone, then no guy or girl will want to talk to you or give you an ounce of attention at a party.
It is true that some people do stay wrapped up in their boyfriend or girlfriend and end up cutting themselves off from the rest of their community. If you're leaving every other weekend to see your boo, there will be an obvious gap in your weekend social life at school.
In a school of thousands, in some cases tens of thousands, no one's going to be putting up "missing person" signs for you. During the rest of the week when you're forced to actually stay at school because of classes, you can't validate that your exclusive other half is being completely exclusive. While you're trying your best to avoid all contact with the other sex, your partner could be banging every other thing that walks, and you would never know.
So why put yourself through all the trouble? Why should you even bother to miss someone who is four hours away while there are literally hundreds of suitable sexy singles just waiting to be swept off their feet?
No other time in your life will you be in such close contact with so many people of the opposite sex. It's like looking through the course catalog and trying to find that one class that'll teach you everything you want to know.
So why not look around? Sign up for the people that interest you. If after a week or two you realized they're not what you're looking for, you can simply drop them. It won't even leave a mark on your record.
Truth is, relationships aren't as simple as adding and dropping classes. When you've spent two years of your high school years with someone, feelings get complicated and attachment is inevitable. While you are only in Intro to Psych for a few months, being with your significant other doesn't have an expiration date.
When to drop the relationship is your call. For many freshmen, as I've noticed, coming to a completely new environment where you can literally know absolutely no one can be one of the hardest adjustments you have to make.
Having that special someone you know you can depend on in your back pocket can be just as comforting as the thinning baby blanket or your tattered teddy bear, Mr. Matsuda, you snuck into your suitcase the night before you left home.
Whether you came to college keeping your high school sweetheart or have found your counterpart at college, staying with your other half just because it makes you feel more secure is unfair to both of you. You both deserve to be with people that you truly want to be with. There is really no need to depend on your relationship status for social-confidence.
Being in college, it's inevitable that you'll meet tons of new people who could well be more suited for you. There's no point keeping tabs on who has more friends of the opposite sex, and Facebook.com friending all the girls that have left messages on your beau's wall is just stalkerish and creepy. In the end, if you're meant to be together you will be. If not, you will know.
Whether you are keeping or had kept your pre-college partner because it makes you feel "safe," or you truly think you two are soulmates and have already named your five children, just because the status quo says you're not going to make it, doesn't mean it's true.
Your fate ultimately depends on you. But if and when you do end up parting ways with your Mr. or Mrs. Right, remember that your trusty side-kick Mr. Matsuda will still be there to tuck you in.
