Donahue

I never watch television. In fact, the only reason I have a television in my room is so that I can watch movies. And I rarely even use it for that purpose. This past Saturday night was one of those rare times that I turned my television on. I wish I had not.

After watching a movie with my girlfriend Rachel, I started flipping through the channels. I caught a glimpse of the flashy blue diamond with a "D" in it that MSNBC's Phil Donahue is so famous for. I do not have cable, so the picture was a little fuzzy. As Rachel fixed the antenna so we could get a better reception, it became clear that it was not really "Donahue," but a Saturday Night Live skit parodying Donahue's show.

I had not watched "Donahue" since early this summer when his new political show first debuted. From my observations, he was one of the more independently minded political personalities on television. And oh yeah, how could I forget _ he is a liberal. But not one of those spineless Democratic centrist liberals: Donahue has a populist flair to him.

It was surprising to me that Donahue's show would exist _ even if it were on a third-rate cable news channel. I did not think people in the US were ready for Donahue's hard-hitting, in-your-face anti-racist, anti-corporate, independent, truth-telling liberalism.

Michael Moore told a crowd at Tufts last year that most of the country is liberal, but that liberal political and cultural leaders today are simply pathetic. Was Michael Moore right? Well certainly it is true that liberal leaders are pathetic. But is most of the country liberal? This week's SNL skit portrayed a different picture.

The Saturday Night Live skit involved Donahue (played by Darrell Hammond) interviewing someone playing Michael Moore. He also had guests Barbra Streisand (played by Maya Rudolph) and Al Sharpton (played by Tracy Morgan). The topic of the show was "Is Liberalism Dead?" The point of the skit was to suggest that no one ever watches Donahue's show; presumably because there aren't any liberals left in America anymore.

At one point they displayed fictional ratings of the three worst shows on television. "Donahue" appeared as second worst _ losing to "The Black Israelite's Hour" and just beating an eye surgery show. Because there was a margin of error larger than their actual ratings, Donahue concludes, "There is no evidence that even one person watches this show." Streisand and Sharpton pound on that fact by repeatedly saying to Donahue, "Nobody likes you."

There were other puns, such as cutting to a commercial break with nothing but a blue screen asking people to submit advertisements, and playing a clip from the next show showing Donahue running into an empty audience with a microphone to get a comment from one of the two people watching the show in the studio. Donahue went on to pick on Michael Moore's bathing habits. Moore said that he would occasionally splash water on himself from a running faucet in a sink and changes clothes just once a year when he needs a bigger shirt.

SNL's perception of Donahue's ratings has merit. Donahue's ratings are pretty bad. MSNBC is actually looking to replace Donahue with ex-Minnesota Governor Jesse Ventura. But it is interesting how comfortable it is for SNL, and everyone else for that matter, to humiliate persons on the left. Consider an alternative scenario where SNL humiliates the right:

The O'Reilly Factor. Bill O'Reilly is interviewing Ann Coulter with guests Trent Lott and Arnold Schwarzenegger as a huge American flag waves in the background, occasionally blocking the camera. The name of the show is "Are Conservatives Imbeciles?"

O'Reilly keeps cutting everyone off and acting like a talking head. Lott and Schwarzenegger repeat how patriotic O'Reilly is and how he is committed to the fight against foreigners. They list the shows with the highest ratings and they show "The O'Reilly Factor" second to "1,000,001 Ways to show your Patriotism," and ahead of "Showdown Iraq: The Wild, Wild Middle East." Then they cut to a car commercial and an SUV the size of Bendetson Hall with an American flag flying from the radio antenna is shown driving over trees in the Amazon rainforest.

I doubt such a parody would ever get on television. Bill O'Reilly has nearly four times the viewers that Donahue has. People prefer the abrasive patriot that talks over people and always calls an ultra-right-winger in to balance the opinion of centrists to the wishy-washy liberal on what some conservatives call "PMSNBC" that is always complaining about something thought to be irrelevant.

The Right scored another pop culture victory over the Left on Saturday night. They have been winning at the pop culture game for some time. I have been told that David Letterman is still making Clinton jokes and audiences are booing at Bush jokes. Although there are counter-examples, the prevailing paradigm is a conservative one. Is liberalism dead? Are liberals just conservatives without the American flag lapel pin? Maybe. If not, it seems like a lot of people think so.

Lou Esparza can be reached at esparza@tuftsdaily.com.